9 Oct 2012

The person that became a mother

I read an article today about mothers making "mummy friends". It is a subject that often comes up in conversations between mothers whether new or experienced.
However the reason I am mentioning this article is not for its specific subject matter but for one single sentence that struck me, and that is : " with an understanding of the person that became a mother".
Now this is a subject that permeates the whole "deconstructing mummy" concept, is the backbone of the mother group meetings and of my philosophy as a psychologist.
Who is this person (that became a mother)? What is her history? How does she feel and what does she think? How has she changed or is currently changing? What will always be the same for her no matter what?
Is she her own person? What does she want out of her life? What does she expect, wish for, secretly yearn for? What scares her, intimidates her, makes her doubt?
Hey my list can go on forever.
The point is, if we get these answers for ourselves (you know, the self that has now become a mother) then we are on our way of being better mothers and more truthful persons. We need our "self centre" to function properly. Let's not forget who we are, because who we are will guide us in "how" we do mothering (amongst other things.)

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